General discussions : Garbage threads : The official Rednecks Being Stupid thread
>
New Topic
>
Reply<
Esato Forum Index
>
General discussions >
Garbage threads
> The official Rednecks Being Stupid thread
Bookmark topic
Redneck Family Tree
Many, many years ago
When I was twenty-three,
I got married to a widow
Who was pretty as could be.
This widow had a daughter
Who had hair of red
My father fell in love with her,
And soon the two were wed.
This made my dad my son-in-law
And changed my very life.
My daughter was my mother,
For she was my father's wife.
To complicate the matters worse,
Although it brought me joy,
I soon became the father
Of a bouncing baby boy.
My little baby then became
A brother-in-law to dad.
And so became my uncle,
Though it made me very sad.
For if he was my uncle,
Then that also made him brother
To the widow's grown-up daughter
Who, of course was my step-mother.
Father's wife then had a son,
Who kept them on the run.
And he became my grandson,
For he was my daughter's son.
My wife is now my mother's mom.
And it surely makes me blue.
Because, although she is my wife,
She is my grandma too.
If my wife is my grandmother,
Then I am her grandchild.
And every time I think of it,
It simply drives me wild.
For now I have become
The strangest case you ever saw.
As the husband of my grandmother,
I am my own grandpa!
--
Posted: 2004-11-05 10:26:49
Edit :
Quote
--
Posted: 2004-11-05 10:30:11
Edit :
Quote
yeee haw!
--
Posted: 2004-11-05 10:33:56
Edit :
Quote
A guy was on trial for murder and if convicted, would get the electric chair. His brother found out that a redneck was on the jury and figured he would be the one to bribe. He told the redneck that he would be paid $10,000 if he could convince the rest of the jury to reduce the charge to manslaughter.
The jury was out an entire week and returned with a verdict of manslaughter.
After the trial, the brother went to the redneck's home, told him what a great job he had done and paid him the $10,000.
The redneck replied that it wasn't easy to convince the rest of the jury to change the charge to manslaughter. They all wanted to let him go.
_________________
Hello, Scroto!
744 green bottles hanging on the wall...
V =
[ This Message was edited by: methylated_spirit on 2004-11-05 10:32 ]
--
Posted: 2004-11-05 11:31:39
Edit :
Quote
--
Posted: 2004-11-05 18:27:08
Edit :
Quote
Apparently, this child prodigy is big news in Louisiana:
--
Posted: 2004-11-06 12:41:35
Edit :
Quote
who knew that a down's syndrome child would outsmart louisiana?
--
Posted: 2004-11-06 12:44:00
Edit :
Quote
The local preacher: Worrying?
--
Posted: 2004-11-06 12:46:48
Edit :
Quote
no, its his daughter
--
Posted: 2004-11-06 12:50:00
Edit :
Quote
From the back cover:
"Old Uncle Hilaire (sic) recalls several leg-slapping tales he heard behind the barn in the days when you didn't have to walk on a broken bottle to get cut! Those were the good old days when the best in petits contes canailles were told in whispers behind the old barn, where kids and women were banned."
A band called "Duke Jupiter":
[ This Message was edited by: methylated_spirit on 2004-11-06 11:54 ]
--
Posted: 2004-11-06 12:52:02
Edit :
Quote
New Topic
Reply
