>
New Topic
>
Reply<
Esato Forum Index
>
General discussions >
Garbage threads
> Post Your funny Jokes Here
Bookmark topic
A wife and her husband were having a dinner party for some important guests. The wife was very excited about this and wanted everything to be perfect. At the very last minute, she realized that she didn't have any snails for the dinner party, so she asked her husband to run down to the beach with the bucket to gather some snails. Very grudgingly he agreed. He took the bucket, walked out the door, down the steps, and out to the beach.
As he was collecting the snails , he noticed a beautiful woman strolling
alongside the water just a little further down the beach. He kept thinking to himself, "Wouldn't it be great if she would even just come down and talk to me?" He went back to gathering the snails. All of a sudden he looked up, and the beautiful woman was standing right over him. They started talking and she invited him back to her place. They ended up spending the night together.
At seven o'clock the next morning he woke up and exclaimed, "Oh no!!!
My wife's dinner party!!!" He gathered all his clothes, put them on real fast, grabbed his bucket, and ran out the door. He ran down the beach all the way to his apartment. He ran up the stairs of his apartment. He was in such a hurry that when he got to the top of the stairs, he dropped the bucket of snails. There were snails all down the stairs.
The door opened just then, with a very angry wife standing in the door way wondering where he's been all this time. He looked at the snails all down the steps, then he looked at her, then back at the snails and said,
"Come on guys, we're almost there!!"
--
Posted: 2007-08-09 16:02:29
Edit :
Quote
A young Native American woman went to a doctor for her first ever physical
exam. After checking all of her vitals and running the usual tests, the
doctor said, "Well, Running Doe, you are in fine health. I could find no
problems. I did notice one anomaly, however."
"Oh, what is that, Doctor?"
"Well, you have no nipples."
"None of my people in my tribe have nipples, " she replied.
"That is amazing," said the doctor. "I'd like to write this up for The South Carolina Journal of Medicine if you don't mind."
She said, "OK."
"First of all" asked the doctor, "how many people are in your tribe?"
She answered, "Approximately 500."
"And what is the name of your tribe?" asked the doctor.
Running Doe replied
We're called The Indian Nippleless Five Hundred
--
Posted: 2007-08-09 16:05:37
Edit :
Quote
LMAO!
Great ones goldenface!
--
Posted: 2007-08-09 21:52:15
Edit :
Quote
Interviewer: what's your qualification?
Dumbo : Sir, I am Ph.d.
Interviewer : what do you mean by Ph.d?
Dumbo: (smiling) PASSED HIGHSCHOOL with DIFFICULTY....
A Dumbo for an exam had studied only one essay 'FRIEND', but in the
exam the essay which came was 'FATHER' . he replaced friend with father
in the essay and it read:
AM A VERY FATHERLY PERSON, I HAVE LOTS OF
FATHERS,
SOME OF MY FATHERS ARE MALE AND SOME ARE FEMALE. MY TRUE
FATHER IS MY NEIGHBOUR.
2 dumbos while driving a Car, one puts on the side indicator and asks the
other to check whether its working, he puts his head out and says
YES...NO...YES...NO...YES...NO...
_________________
My K-JAM thread(with loads of pics)
Proud owner of i-mate K-JAM & 
K550i [ This Message was edited by: EviL EyE on 2007-08-14 11:14 ]
--
Posted: 2007-08-14 12:13:07
Edit :
Quote
http://www.esato.com/news/article.php/id=1756
i wish it were a joke.. these happenings aren't..
just goes to show how big corporations (and countries) can evade responsibility and cheat people..
recently a quiet a few explosions of Nokia's (batteries) made for good coverage on news channels and the recall.
and here is a quote extract from their (Nokia's) previous stand (as early as 2003).. makes us wonder if they were just shrugging off responsibility and those were
intentional lies.. borne out of the need for higher profit motives by sourcing cheapest vendors..
http://news.zdnet.co.uk/hardware/0,1000000091,39117035,00.htm
Nokia on Thursday pointed the finger at counterfeit batteries after another of its phones exploded and burned its user, the third such case in two months, and
said that original batteries sold with its phones were safe.
yeah rite.. they were ALWAYS safe.. then why this->
http://www.nokia.com/batteryreplacement/
Hopefully, some people who blindly follow Blokia will be better aware
--
Posted: 2007-08-14 22:24:33
Edit :
Quote
When everybody on earth was dead and waiting to enter Paradise, God appeared and said, "I want the men to make two lines, one line for the men who were true heads of their household, and the other line for the men who were dominated by their women. I want all the women to report to St. Peter."
Soon, the women were gone, and there were two lines of men.
The line of the men who were dominated by their wives was 100 miles long, and in the line of men who truly were heads of their household, there was only one man.
God said, "You men should be ashamed of yourselves, I created you to be the Head of your household! You have been disobedient and have not fulfilled your purpose! Of all of you, only one obeyed. Learn from him."
God turned to the one man, "How did you manage to be the only one in this line?"
The man replied, "My wife told me to stand here."
--
Posted: 2007-08-18 14:01:31
Edit :
Quote
On 2007-08-09 16:02:29, goldenface wrote:
A wife and her husband were having a dinner party for some important guests. The wife was very excited about this and wanted everything to be perfect. At the very last minute, she realized that she didn't have any snails for the dinner party, so she asked her husband to run down to the beach with the bucket to gather some snails. Very grudgingly he agreed. He took the bucket, walked out the door, down the steps, and out to the beach.
As he was collecting the snails , he noticed a beautiful woman strolling
alongside the water just a little further down the beach. He kept thinking to himself, "Wouldn't it be great if she would even just come down and talk to me?" He went back to gathering the snails. All of a sudden he looked up, and the beautiful woman was standing right over him. They started talking and she invited him back to her place. They ended up spending the night together.
At seven o'clock the next morning he woke up and exclaimed, "Oh no!!!
My wife's dinner party!!!" He gathered all his clothes, put them on real fast, grabbed his bucket, and ran out the door. He ran down the beach all the way to his apartment. He ran up the stairs of his apartment. He was in such a hurry that when he got to the top of the stairs, he dropped the bucket of snails. There were snails all down the stairs.
The door opened just then, with a very angry wife standing in the door way wondering where he's been all this time. He looked at the snails all down the steps, then he looked at her, then back at the snails and said,
"Come on guys, we're almost there!!"
Nice soccer am joke lol.
I'm here all week
--
Posted: 2007-08-18 14:03:59
Edit :
Quote
Glasgow Rangers manager flies to Baghdad to watch a young Iraqi play Football and is suitably impressed and arranges for him to come over to Scotland.
Two weeks later the 'Gers are 4-0 down to Aberdeen with only 20 minutes left. The manager gives the young Iraqi striker the nod and on he goes.
The lad is a sensation - scores 5 goals in 20 minutes and wins the game for Rangers! The fans are delighted, the players and coaches are delighted and the media love the new star.
When the player comes off the pitch he phones his mum to tell her about his first day in Scottish football.
"Hello mum, guess what?" he says in an Iraqi accent. "I played for 20 minutes today, we were 4-0 down but I scored 5 and we won. Everybody loves me, the fans, the media, they all love me."
" Wonderful," says his mum, "Let me tell you about my day.
Your father got shot in the street and robbed, your sister and I were ambushed, gang raped and beaten and your brother has joined a gang of looters, and all while you were having such great time."
The young lad is very upset, "What can I say mum, but I'm so sorry."
"Sorry?!!! Sorry?!!!" says his mum, "It's your bloody fault we moved to Glasgow in the first place!"
--
Posted: 2007-08-18 14:05:30
Edit :
Quote
An old singer turned up to the stage. As he started singing, his artifical teeth fell down. Hastily, he fitted into the mouth but as he began singing these fell down again.
When this process went on for a number of times, a person said angrily,' Would you sing something or go on changing the Cds'
--
Posted: 2007-08-23 12:11:00
Edit :
Quote
*conversation to g/f*
when i said i was positive, i meant HIV+
--
Posted: 2007-08-23 22:31:01
Edit :
Quote
New Topic
Reply
