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ELEPHANT JOKES
Q: How do you shoot a blue elephant?
A: With a blue elephant gun, of course.
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Q: How do you shoot a red elephant?
A: No, not with a red elephant gun. You strangle him until he turns blue, then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.
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Q: How do you shoot a green elephant?
A: Tell him a dirty joke so he turns red, strangle him until he turns blue, then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.
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Q: How do you shoot a pink elephant?
A: First you bake a cake, and put 3 raisins on top, then you take it out in the jungle where the pink elephant will find it, and you wait. Eventually the elephant comes along, finds the cake, eats the raisins and throws the cake away. Then you go home and bake another cake and put 2 raisins on top, take it out in the jungle where the elephant will find it. The elephant comes along, finds the cake, eats the 2 raisins and throws the cake away. You go home and bake another cake and put only one raisin on it. Then you trek back into the jungle and put the cake where the pink elephant will find it. The elephant comes along eats the raisin, and throws that cake away. Now you go home and bake another cake, but (here's the sneaky part) you don't put any raisins on it. You take it out into the jungle where the elephant will find it and lie in wait. The pink elephant comes along and finds the cake, he gets SO mad that there aren't any raisins on it, he turns red, then you jump on him, strangle him until he turns blue......and you shoot him with a BLUE ELEPHANT GUN!!!
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Q: How do you shoot a yellow elephant?
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A: Aw, come on, have you ever seen a yellow elephant !?!
Found These on Orkut sorry if they are already posted
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Posted: 2009-06-08 18:33:03
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^^^
I love weird jokes
Here's a little bit of advice for you:
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"Advi "
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Posted: 2009-06-08 19:26:20
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If you receive an email from the Department of Health warning you not to eat tinned Pork because of swine flu.
Ignore it, It`s just Spam
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Posted: 2009-06-08 19:35:30
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On 2009-06-08 19:35:30, nicv27 wrote:
If you receive an email from the Department of Health warning you not to eat tinned Pork because of swine flu.
Ignore it, It`s just Spam
Was that a joke ???
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Posted: 2009-06-08 19:59:15
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Yes
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Posted: 2009-06-08 20:11:48
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firoz,
SPAM here also refers to a food item (canned food) which is unavailable in India (Im an Indian) so if you knew that, it would be a joke.
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Posted: 2009-06-08 20:58:12
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Oh Sorry. I Didn't really knew it.
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Posted: 2009-06-09 07:09:17
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Woman in Coma
A woman was in a coma. Nurses were in her room giving her a sponge bath.
One of them was washing her private area and noticed that there was a response on the monitor when she touched her.
They went to her husband and explained what happened, telling him, "As crazy as this sounds, maybe a little oral sex will do the trick and bring her out of the coma."
The husband was skeptical, but they assured him that they'd close the curtains for privacy.
The hubby finally agreed and went into his wife's room.
After a few minutes the woman's monitor flat lined, no pulse, no heart rate.
The nurses ran into the room. "What happened?" they cried.
The husband said, "I guess she choked."
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Posted: 2009-06-09 10:14:32
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a little outdated perhaps.. yet a fitting satire
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Bonus Payment For Generals
The Pentagon recently found it had too many generals and offered an early retirement bonus. They promised any general who retired straight away would get his full annual benefits plus 10,000 Dollars for every inch measured in a straight line between any two parts of the general's body, with the general getting to select any pair of points he wished.
The first man, an Air Force general, accepted. He asked the pension man to measure from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. Six feet. He walked out with a check of 720,000 Dollars.
The second man, an Army general, asked them to measure from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. Eight feet. He walked out with a check for 960,000 Dollars.
When the third general, a grizzled old Marine, was asked where to measure, he told the pension man ... "From the tip of my penis to the bottom of my testicles."
The pension man suggested that perhaps the Marine general might like to reconsider, pointing out the nice cheques the previous two generals had received. The Marine insisted and the pension expert said that would be fine, but that he'd better get the medical officer to do the measuring.
The medical officer arrived and asked the general to drop the pants. He did. The medical officer placed the tape on the tip of the general's penis and began to work back. "My God!" he said. "Where are your testicles?"
The general replied, "One in Iraq and the other in Afghanistan... Keep measuring."
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Posted: 2009-06-11 22:45:21
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Muhammad-Oli Posts: > 500
Haha that was pretty good.
Welcome to Esato mate.
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Posted: 2009-06-12 06:23:48
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