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Them scouse jokes were from a mate of mine
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Posted: 2011-03-26 16:21:00
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Yo mama so lazy she thinks a two-revenue family members is exactly where yo daddy has two jobs.Yo mama so lazy she's received a remote control just to run her remote!Yo mama so lazy that she came in last place in a recent snail marathon.
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Posted: 2011-03-28 15:59:42
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My dog went missing last week. I have been looking everywhere for him. The Mrs told me I should look harder. So I shaved my head and got a few tattoos but I still can't find the flipping dog!!
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Posted: 2011-03-28 22:40:00
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A blonde is walking on the pavement. Then she sees a banana skin, and shouts: Oh shit I will fall again.
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Posted: 2011-04-14 17:25:22
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My son had his first swimming lesson yesterday and came home with a 10 meter badge.I said, "Bloody hell, couldn't they give you something smaller?"
Did you know it takes 40 pigs to make 3,000 sausages?It's amazing what you can teach them
[ This Message was edited by: nicv27 on 2011-04-14 22:04 ]
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Posted: 2011-04-14 23:01:36
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I fell out with my neighbours pig. So to clear the air I suggested a game of tennis. He said he was too tired. So I suggested a game of backgammon & he ran off squealing
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Posted: 2011-04-16 23:33:16
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Prince William says he does not want the traditional fruitcake at his wedding. Prince Philip has replied by saying he does not give a damn & is still going
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Posted: 2011-04-17 21:49:17
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TEXTING FOR SENIORS:
The kids have all their little SMS codes....like BFF,TTYL,LOL etc. So here are the codes for the seniors:
ATD-At The Doctors
BFF-Best Friends Funeral
BTW-Bring The Wheelchair
FWIW-Forgot Where I Was
GGPBL-Gotta Go Pacemaker Battery Low
GHA-Got Heartburn Again
HGBM-Had Good Bowel Movement
IMHO-Is My Hearing Aid On??
TTYL-Talk To You Louder
WAITT-Who Am I Texting??
GGLKI-Gotta Go Laxative Kicking In
[ This Message was edited by: Bonovox on 2011-07-13 19:58 ]
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Posted: 2011-07-13 20:57:36
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5000 men surveyed were asked why they like blow jobs
1% liked the warmth
2% liked the sensation
3% liked the eroticism
94% just liked the peace & quiet
[ This Message was edited by: Bonovox on 2011-07-17 18:12 ]
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Posted: 2011-07-17 19:11:45
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Posted: 2011-07-18 17:31:51
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