News Forum Phone database

> New Topic
> Reply
< Esato Forum Index > General discussions > Garbage threads > Story: Eric the schmuck ... Bookmark topic

when suddenly, out of a darkness a mysterious man emerges. he silently and swiftly worked on the pile of nuts and bolts left in the garage. using only the things he found in the garage, he is able to painstakingly put the thing back together until, just a few minutes later, the ferrari is back together! sure it was held together by pieces of garden hose, electric tape, and used parts from a discraded lawnmower, but it was running and purring like a jungle cat ready to pounce. eric could not help but break out with a wide grin. as the mysterious man turned to leave, eric had to ask "who are you?" the stranger faces eric, his intense eyes turning into slits and anwered "McGyver".

Eric, astonishly asks "McGyver?" and the strangers says "yes, Menemis Mcgyver"

as the stranger disappears back into the darkness, eric wonders out loud "so thats his first name...Menemis"

when suddenly in the distance, he hears a loud and painful shriek.....
--
Posted: 2003-04-10 15:56:00
Edit : Quote


Xena the violent shemale had just shoved her sword up Michael Schumachers ass!!! The pilot screamed with pain!!! Next, she ripped out Schumie's genitals and ate them with pleasure!!! The world champion fell to the ground, inanimated by pain!!!!
Xena turned to Kimmi, Cherie and Eric and whispered: "I never liked this guy since the moment he said that 'accidents happen' when Ayrton Senna died!!! U CUNTS ARE NEXT!!!", she growled while she removed the sword out of Schumachers ass... Kimmi Raikonen turned to Eric and Cherie and asked: "Quick!!! I can be World Champion now!!!! Where's your car?!?!?!?!"
Xena started cleaning the scatered blood that layed in the blade of her sword with her tongue... She gazed at the three men sadisticly...
Eric screamed in despair: "We haven't got a car... only cherie's bike!!! we're dead!!! and so is the poor child i carry in my stomach!!!"
"And it doesn't carry 3 people!!! only 2... so i'm out of here!!! i have to live to love FIJBERT!!! good luck u guys!!!" Cherie added, while running cowardly towards his harley... Xena saw it... she took a big black dildo in the shape of a boomerang and threw it in Cherie's direction!!! With a loud "SMACK!" it hitted the gay biker in the back of the head!!! Cherie fell like a sack of potatoes... Kimmi runned over to him to try to feel his pulse and announced with panic: "he's dead!..."
Eric screamed: "oh my god, u killed Kenny!... u BASTARD!!!", took the black dildo in his hand and throwed it with all his might at Xena... "CLACK..."
The shemale caught the dildo weapon with her teeth!!!
"U'rs is next, dance queen!", she said with a hateful laugh...
"WE'RE FOOKED!!! let's flee in Cheries bike! - u drive kimmi!! - i don't have a licence!!!"
Kimmi answered... "i don't have a licence too!!! I ONLY DRIVE CARS, U KNOW!... (waittaminute... didn't u just say the biker's name was Kenny?)"...
"forget that! i watched too much TV before dying!!!", Eric stated...
"But u're not dead yet...?", kimmi questioned, with a troubled look...
"oh... but i'm gonna be soon... SHE'S WALKING THIS WAY!!!", Eric shouted in complete panic...
Suddenly a black sports car with red flashing lights came around the corner, tires screeching, with "walk this way" (Aerosmith + Run DMC version) playing surprisingly loud in the radio... The driver shouted: "do u like this song too?! well, hop in, i'll give you guys a lift if u sing along with me!!!"
Kimmi and eric didn't dwell on it as Xena aproached, and immediatly entered the car... The black car screeched suddenly leaving the hollering Xena far behind...
The driver introduced himself, glancing at eric: "HI! i'm MICHAEL KNIGHT, and this is my car KITT! Do u cuties come here often?..."
--
Posted: 2003-04-10 18:13:00
Edit : Quote


All snuggled inside the black car curiously called Kitt, they left the scene and Xena behind.
Kitt RACED out of the town of Montreal, onto a deserted highway to middle Canada. As they raced on, a dot appeared at the horizon.

After a few minutes, Eric was able to make out the shape of a large truk driving in front of them. Kitt was heading straigh at it.

'What R U doin' Knight??' squealed Eric, as they came nearer and nearer to the truck. 'U gonna hit that thing!' 'Watch out man!' 'I ain't ready to die!'

The back side of the truck was open and ready for them. With an evil smile, Michael Knight said: 'Step into my office cuties'
They drove straight into the truck, and the truck back doors closed right behind them.

'U R all MINE now' said a deep voice behind them....

--
Posted: 2003-04-10 23:06:00
Edit : Quote


*clap-clap-clap*

all hail cyanx7... i laughed so hard my work mates tot i've gone nuts or something....luckily me boss is not in yet

oh boy!!!! u guys are so good at it.........

now take that ferrari and sanjeev
--
Posted: 2003-04-11 03:57:00
Edit : Quote


'U R all MINE now' said a deep voice behind them.... "NOW, What?" Eric thought. The room they went into was more like a motel room, dimly lit with low-voltaged halogens onthe corner ceiling. The "office" has a heart shaped revolving waterbed for it's center-piece (think Austin Powers) with with a red silk sheet snugly placed over some red satin lined comforter. Sex, sex, and more sex...shag me BABY is definitely what this Michael had in mind when he designed this room. Kimmi and Eric just stood there, Eric half expecting for Kimmy to be petrified with fear of what in Isis' name he got himself into (first the car, then this???).

With Bon Voyage's Kiss My Lips track humming on the background, Micheal starts to strip...

Come on baby kiss my lips
Love me like I want you to

Then Kimmy strips to the sensual beat of the song.

Keep me up all night
If you make it right

Eric then gently fumbles through his jean's buttons, undoing one, then the other, then another all the while keeping his eyes glued onto the two guys before him.

Come on baby kiss my lips
Come on baby kiss
Come on baby kiss my lips come on

With nothing on except their boxers, they just stood there, as though waiting for some signal or sumthin. As the song reaches it's crescendo, Michael shouts, "NOW!" then the three kids jumped on the bed...and jumped...and jumped...higher...and harder...and faster. "Isn't this so much FUN," says Kimmy. "Faster guys, jump harder til this waterbed burst, then THAT would be fun," ordered the chuckling Michael to which the two morons happily complied. They felt they never had so much fun their entire life!

Outside the locked "office," the A.I. running the mobile installation started getting a radar blip while doing surface scans on the freeway landscape over a 2-mile long radius while screams of joy and laughter come through muffled from the closed room...
--
Posted: 2003-04-12 12:23:00
Edit : Quote




[ This Message was edited by: sanjeevjaya on 2003-04-19 11:45 ]
--
Posted: 2003-04-12 16:47:00
Edit : Quote


The aliens were closing in on the truck. While inside, climax was building as the three humped away. The invaders plan on dissecting the truck for possible earth-species specimen, lasers were readied, vacuum sealed incubating chambers were filled with noxious sedative gas, and radial scanners on the ship's control confirmed targets to be three humans. All of the targets registered a read-out indicating accelerated pulse, gnashing teeth, abnormally profuse sweating, and weird inter-exchange of bodily fluids which the aliens found to be quite out of the ordinary and interesting. This excited the aliens to study their latest find all the more.

As the "leader" they call Pdjirmuk poised a skeletal limb to push an ornate button like protrusion on the panel that would launch the lasers, their scanners suddenly got jammed by a shrill sound emanating from the truck. A cry so intense that their systems went haywire. Red warning lights flooded the halls and corridors and aliens ran amok all over the ship. The saucer attempted by itself to activate protective shield but that too failed. The last recourse was to abort the earth mission. Automatic commands generated some precalculated coordinates launching a portal onto which the ship sped for escape. None of the aliens survived the holocaust which befell them.

Inside the truck, first one, then two, then three voices, (tenor, baritone, and bass) each an octave higher than the first, blended in a fatally deafening crescendo of pure adulterated ecstasy and bliss as cum spewed on wanton mouths and crevices. And they all weren't even aware (nor would they give a shit had they known) that they are all lucky to have cum a heartbeat before their fatal doom.

In the darkness of a dimly illuminated truck stuck in a state highway somewhere close to nowhere, three happily wasted people slept with smiles on their faces (and cum in their asses).

[ This Message was edited by: Scythe on 2003-04-14 09:28 ]
--
Posted: 2003-04-14 10:24:00
Edit : Quote


applauds Master scythe!!!!
--
Posted: 2003-04-14 13:01:00
Edit : Quote


"A cry so intense that their systems went haywire..."

i beg to differ... this sounds a lot like Tim Burton's "Mars Attacks"...
what do you have to say 4 u'rself, scythe?...
--
Posted: 2003-04-14 13:40:00
Edit : Quote


Well, um, I cant seem to do a story out of the current plot so I was thinking of maybe killing the aliens and getting on with the story without them. Mars Attacks was definitely on my mind when I did this bit
--
Posted: 2003-04-14 14:13:00
Edit : Quote

---

New Topic   Reply

Forum Index